As the year comes to a close I guess this would be the best time to stop and think of the past and how we can build on it for the future.
In terms of dating, I had my heart broken early this year because I was naive and impulsive. And through the subsequent decisions I made, I continued to drag my heart along. As a break from all the emo posts I've been writing lately I believe this one will be the most comical!
In attempt to help me move on from my first broken heart my friends somehow convinced me to try speed dating. Worst experience of dating yet - and trust me I have some pretty bad experiences to date. Maybe it was the timer, the sheet we had to fill up or the guys weren't that interesting - wait no that was me I was miserable inside.
The month of Hallmark, Godiva and Florists International. I probably went on a few first dates this month. I was convinced that a month was enough time for me to move on and thus begun my serial dating experience. Most of my dates originated through Plenty of Fish and from the bar - but let me air this out here. People present themselves the same whether online or in person. One guy I met was fine at first and then started twitching - he said he was quiting smoking. And then later I found out he was a coke addict and wanted to a line off my .... GREAT!
After a few texts back and forth, I somehow thought it was okay to meet up with the guy who broke my heart again. This lead to two nights of pretty amazing sex and then 1, 2, ... 8 months of wishing I had decided against it.
This month was pretty quiet for me. Oh except I ran into my ex while out for drinks with a good friend and got drunk enough to leave with him ... except then he left me thinking I had ditched him althought I just slipped to go to the bathroom. And instead of apologizing he was reeming me out and demanding I trek to his apartment because he couldn't be bothered to leave his bed. So the next day I was broken hearted and my good friend was pissed off for me ditching her - karma really does come back - faster than you think! Dating has been a rollercoaster ride. I often try not to generalize or typify Vancouver guys or guys in general because I hate it when the reverse happens. Its infuriating to hear the generalizations about dating in Vancouver that some articles post or some people rant about. There are great guys and great girls out there - I know this because I have met them and know them, they are just hard to find. Please note how this blog is specific to me and my experience.
I'm pretty sure the guy I dated for the month of May was bi-polar. I didn't know this when I met him and the subsequent weeks I dated him but in the end I definitely knew it. I met him online - I know, I know. Trust me, my optimistic and naive outlook of online dating was changed after this. He seemed great, had a good job, recently invested in a place, was active, he looked like he did online and I was attracted to him. He was assertive, educated and knowledgeable. And then a few weeks in, I would notice his personality switches would come around and they were quite extreme. The most extreme was the last time I saw him. We went on a nice romantic date, had dinner at a local french bistro and ended up on a restaurant patio overlooking the mountains. After ordering a bottle of wine, he launched into a verbal and emotional attack of who I am and what I do. I am pretty emotional so I cried, quietly, but cried. I guess I was confused as to what was happening and internally conflicted as to whether I should stand up for myself and argue but at the same time I didn't want to stoop to his level as he had caused quite a scene with his yelling. The waitress had asked him to leave a couple times before the restaurant manager escorted him out. I know you must be wanting details because clearly I must have said something but screw you for even thinking that any person has the right to treat someone else that way.
I forgot to mention that the night I was left crying at a restaurant patio I was super drunk and the next morning I realized I had texted my ex. We texted a couple times again he asked to go for drinks and I was in class so I said something about not being able to. I went for drinks with some friends one night and deviously decided to see him - the next day he said he would text and never did. Really - I know I cause my own problems.
After half the year going by with such insanity I decided to focus on myself in July, especially as it was my birth month. I did meet someone though and we started dating towards the end of the month. He was quiet, industrious and seemed a bit shy. We had good conversations though and he seemed hard working which I liked.
This was the slowest dating experience I've had. Maybe because he was either shy or "wasn't that into me" I feel like I had been the more assertive one. Although I know he made some effort it wasn't enough for me? This must make me sound like a snob but he would have rather played golf with his 40 year old golf buddies than see me. We hadn't seen each other for a week or so? --- Is this too high maintenance of me? Clearly we both wanted things the other couldn't provide.
September - This was a time where I switched jobs and began working 10-12 hour days 7 days a week. So I didn't date.
This has been a long enough post of me rambling about my dating experience ... part 2 is to come!
